Aha! Blogolicious! Musings and Meanings of Non-Sensical Events...and Canada? In the past, it focused on music reviews, humor and satiric editorials. Now, it will concentrate on cartoons, art, and comic strips: Hypocrisy Fleas, Time Travelin' Dogs, DC Kids (with Purple Girl) and Dark Farm.
I'm also including a new photo of Westcott & Rodway, one of the groups that won the 2006 Aha! Blogolicious! Media Award for Innovation. They are a musical duo that does an incredibly beautiful and compelling jazz/classical/flamenco fusion. Recently, they sent me a photo showing them holding the award--it helps ease my mind that the award made it all the way to Exeter, England without breakage--and it's nice to see the winner actually holding the award, too. Karen Nielsen, who also won for her short film, Perceptions, also sent in her photo and it was included in her recent profile and interview. Westcott and Rodway were profiled/interviewed a couple months ago before they received the trophy, so I'm only now getting a photo. Just search for their names on this blog to see the interview and check out their myspace page to hear their music (or to see Karen's film, Perceptions.)
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
By Ima Spoofer
(Related Stories: Review of So You Think You Can Dance LIVE Tour Seattle Premier is below this article, see archives for articles on Seattle Seahawks Android Player Scandal and Gordon Michael Woolvett Wins Blogolicious Lifetime Achievement Nomination.)
Recently, highly unethical and secret DNA tests were performed by Secret Blogolicious Field and Stream Operatives on both men in order to confirm the rumors and recent speculation that there was some sort of genetic link between the two.
The results were positive—identical, in fact.
Sources not-so-close to Mr. Woolvett say that yes, there were times when he was about seventeen or eighteen where he claims that he had little recall of his activities. So it is possible, say experts, that Mr. Woolvett's DNA was stolen while he had been incapacitated in some way in order to take samples or perhaps when he simply had too much to drink at a party. It does not seem likely that the writer/actor/director had any knowledge of the DNA theft, nor is complicit in the actual experimentation and creation of the clone.
As for the alleged clone in question, eighteen year old jazz/lyrical/contemporary dancer, Travis Wall was the runner-up in the FOX summer hit, So You Think You Can Dance and is currently touring with the national LIVE show which sold out just thirty minutes after tickets went online. (Mr. Wall turns nineteen on September 16, 2006.)
The Wall family aggressively denies that Travis is a clone of the famous actor and that he came into the world in the traditional manner—they cite hospital records as proof. If any tampering were involved, say experts, it is possible that secret government agents from
The height, build and eerily matching appearances of both men could simply be coincidence, say sources. After all, look how many supposed clones of Pamela Anderson are running around—even the ones without extensive silicon augmenting?
Experts say that at first, considering the amazing strength, flexibility and jumping ability of Travis Wall, they wondered if perhaps the young man was not a clone but an android. This wouldn't be the first time that androids were discovered masquerading as athletes (see earlier article on the Seattle Seahawks Android Players Expose on this blog.) However, DNA tests proved otherwise. They also state that talent often emerges differently based on environment, so the original being a gifted actor doesn't negate the likelihood of a clone becoming a gifted dancer.
How many clones there are running around of the Canadian actor is currently unknown, nor why Mr. Woolvett in particular was singled out. It is possible, say sources, that this is only the beginning of a new Canadian Cultural Offensive against the
Why you may ask? Perhaps, say experts, they are trying to improve the current state of American television. After all, experts point to all the American clones of not only actors but television shows that are currently running on U.S. and World televisions—but generally not with good result. This could simply be a counterplot to the current studio cloning projects.
Let's hope so.
This is a satirical spoof, meaning, don't take it seriously.
Blog site: http://ahablogolicious.blogspot.com/
URL: http://home.myuw.net/cganders/
Owner and technocrat Paul Allen denies rumors that he has been substituting robots for real players!
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
By R.U. Gettinthis
Mr. Allen, who founded and owns Vulcan, a diversified company into high tech, film as well as genetic and brain research, denies that he has been building specialized football bots and placing them, unknown to the human players, on his football team in order to improve the team's record. He further denies that he replaced the coach of the team with an AI Supercomputer linked to an android replica last year.
But sources say that Mr. Allen had been in secret negotiations with the Intelligent Robotics Laboratory, part of the Graduate School of Engineering, Department of Adaptive Machine Systems at
Mr. Allen's representatives further claim that all pictures taken during a recent press junket have been grossly misinterpreted. They further state that the fact that one player, in a recent interview, who broke down during the interview with smoke clearly coming out of his ears was simply overly tired from a hard day of training. It had been a hot day, said the PR rep for the Seahawks, and the player in question was simply very, very thirsty.
The rep continued to say that just because Mr. Allen's company is named Vulcan—after both the science fiction character from Star Trek, Mr. Spock, and the mythic Roman God who created the weapons of the gods, including the thunderbolts of Jupiter—it does not in any way imply that the company is involved in robotic design…just genetic research.
Last year the Seattle Seahawks played in the Super Bowl. It was the first appearance at the bowl for the team since their inception.
CG Anderson is a 10 year market researcher and web strategist involved in technology, science and the online world. Also a writer, blogger and novelist. CG's comments are personal and opinionated and solely the responsibility of the author, so there. Don't like the opinions, disagree, agree, don't know? Great, make a comment—clean ones will be allowed, netiquette-challenged ones will be ignored!
Blog site: http://ahablogolicious.blogspot.com/
URL: http://home.myuw.net/cganders/
World Leaders Thrilled, Microsoft disappointed, Google embarrassed!
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:
By Offun D. Cuff
Apparently, the goliath decided to take matters into their own hands to prevent such an embarrassing contesting of their absolute power and unleashed their infamous and always legally deniable Space Satellite DeathRay (bought for a song at a government Star Wars surplus auction last year.)
Unfortunately, to the company's embarrassment, their intelligence was in error on the location of the famous JibJab brothers, Gregg and Evan Spiridellis. Google bigwigs assumed that JibJab would be located in
We were unable to reach JibJab for comment.
According to O.N. Wannabenot, a foreign correspondent with the always reputable news agency, The Onion, when other countries heard about the tragic loss of the D.C. area and all of its inhabitants, they were thrilled. When it was revealed later that President Bush and most of his cabinet were not in residence at the time, but were in fact in
In retaliation for the attack, the
When asked, Microsoft reported that it was thrilled, but later changed from that euphoria when they realized that it simply meant more free press for Google—and when they realized that even more than 50% (the previous penetration number quoted for Google) of internet connected devices out there were being infected by the Google Virus.
Not even a Microsoft targeted virus ever made that kind of dent in the market, experts say! Microsoft exec's promised that they would continue their campaign to regain their Evil Empire status, so that they could regain their "most favored software company" status with virus writers everywhere.
Note: No Republicans were actually barbequed at the President's BBQ. (A few democrats were though—and they were considered a leaner cut than their fat cat opponents and a therefore, much healthier choice among the calorie conscious.)
This is a satirical spoof, meaning, don't take it seriously.
Blog site: http://ahablogolicious.blogspot.com/
URL: http://home.myuw.net/cganders/
CG Anderson is a 10 year market researcher and web strategist involved in technology, science and the online world. Also a writer, blogger and novelist. CG's comments are personal and opinionated and solely the responsibility of the author, so there. Don't like the opinions, disagree, agree, don't know? Great, make a comment—clean ones will be allowed, netiquette-challenged ones will be ignored!
